Salvation
by mermaidm0tel
Summary: "this could be our own." / or, a universe where joel and tess foster ellie
1. the big commitment

The clock read 5:52 am.

Joel looked up as the door closed. "You're home early."

Tess sank beside him on the couch, a sigh escaping her lips. She hated graveyard shifts.

"Long night?" Joel asked, dropping a kiss on her hair.

"You have no idea," Tess scoffed, smiling slightly. "Some party went way out of control."

"Oh, yeah. I heard."

"Had to bring in some hooligans. Most of them underage," Tess looked down, shaking her head. "Makes me wonder what kinda parents they have, y'know?"

"Mm-hmm."

As if being pulled out of a trance, her head snapped up. She looked around, and then at him. "Where's the kid?"

Joel gestured to the armchair near the couch they were on. Tess squinted at the blanket-covered lump curled up on it that was supposedly their foster kid.

She quietly made her way over and knelt next to the armchair. Tess gingerly brushed the girl's hair away from her face, eyes trailing over the spattering of freckles along her cheeks and the bridge of her nose.

"Oh, she's so beautiful," Tess murmured. "Can't wait to see her eyes."

"You're goin' soft."

She rolled her eyes, but smiled nonetheless.

The sleeping girl let out a soft snore.

"Looks like you guys had a long night too."

"You have no idea," Joel mocked playfully.

"Oh, ha-ha."

"It's a big commitment, Tess."

"Yeah," Tess said, glancing at the backpack resting against the bottom of the armchair. She paused hesitantly before speaking. "I thought this would be good for you, since Sarah –"

"Tess—"

"I get it," Tess said firmly. "But you know just as well as I do that there's no escaping the past."

Joel sighed. "You're right."

"This is for Ellie too," she said, eyes steely. "I want to protect her. I couldn't handle the thought of another child — and now the thought of her becoming one of these kids I bring in everyday, and... I've been thinking about doing this for quite some time, you know that. Just so happens to be her."

"Girl must be special."

"Must be," Tess smiled, only for her face to fall again. "Sorry I wasn't there when they dropped her off. I should've—"

"We've been over this," he waved her off reassuringly. "Practically talked my goddamn ear off the past couple months. I got it all taken care of. Nothin' to worry about."

"Still, I wanted to be there for it," she said ruefully, her eyes trailing over the girl's face. "What's she like?"

"Well..." Joel paused to think. "She's somethin' else."

* * *

 **a/n:** i've never written for this game before lmao i hope i do it justice (as much justice as i can do it in an AU ofc)! so i can do better, leave feedback if you wanna! mm-mmm i love me some feed


	2. joel the brick wall

Ellie opened her eyes to armchair fabric.

"You seriously let her sleep there?" a low, soothing voice reached her ears.

"No," came Joel's familiar gruff voice. "Girl's stubborn. Tried to stay up waitin' for you."

"Did you at least feed her?"

"You kidding? She ate about three times her weight."

Ellie forced herself upright and rubbed the sleep from her eyes.

"Hey, there she is."

Her hands left her eyes as they flew open. The voice belonged to a woman who she undoubtedly knew was Tess. Tess and Joel stood behind the bar in the kitchen. The smell of coffee wafted into Ellie's nostrils.

 _Yuck._

"Morning," she mumbled, stifling a yawn.

"Hey, kiddo," Joel said simply, keeping his eyes on his newspaper, still clearly avoiding looking at her.

She wrinkled her nose.

"Good morning," Tess, still in police uniform, raised her mug. "You sleep okay, Ellie?"

Ellie nodded sluggishly. "What time is it?"

"About 6:30," Tess replied. She gestured to a plate stacked with pancakes, steam still billowing from the heap. "Breakfast?"

"Fu—uh… heck yes."

Ellie stretched as she got up, walking towards the bar. She watched the woman scrounge for something in the fridge. Tess brought a carton of milk out and closed the fridge. With her free hand, Tess grabbed the magnetic marker and scribbled something on a magnetized board stuck to the door.

"I like apple juice better," Ellie said, squinting at the writing.

"Noted," Tess responded, rubbing off the "orange" from "orange juice."

Ellie grinned as she sat on the stool opposite Joel while Tess placed everything in front of her. She cautiously served herself and began eating.

All pretenses of good manners quickly went out the window as soon as she had a forkful.

"Good?" Tess asked, amused.

Ellie spoke through a mouthful of pancake. "Awesome."

"I'm glad," Tess chuckled. "Texas here doesn't have much cooking skills to offer."

"Hey, now—"

"Alright, keep your pants on."

Ellie watched the two. "So, Mr and Mrs Miller—"

"Uh…"

"We ain't—"

"Got it," Ellie backtracked. There was a long, drawn-out silence. "So, uh… it's Saturday. What's the game plan?"

"Well, let's see," Tess said. "Joel has work in the afternoon. Maybe the two of us could go to the mall."

"Okay, sounds cool."

"I almost forgot," Tess snapped her fingers, causing Joel to involuntarily look up from his paper, looking mildly alarmed.

 _Damn. Looks like he stayed up longer than I did._

Tess carried on without taking notice. "Since you're in long term placement, you're gonna be switching schools. That cool?"

"Yes ma'am."

"How old are you again?" Joel asked. "Twelve?"

"Fourteen," she replied pointedly. _Dammit._

"Fourteen," Tess repeated. "You're starting high school, then."

"Yeah."

"We'll worry about that later," Tess said dismissively. "I'm gonna go change. Need to catch some Z's for later."

 _No need to tell me twice_ , Ellie thought. "Thanks, Tess."

"Sure thing."

Ellie watched her disappear upstairs. She turned back to watch Joel pour himself another cup of coffee. "Whoa, that's like your fourth cup."

"Mm-hmm," he hummed, walking into the living room with coffee in hand.

Ellie trailed after him, watching him settle on the couch and turn on the TV.

A beat of silence as he flipped through programs.

"So…" she began, drawing the word out. "Nice house."

"Thanks, built it myself," came the short reply.

"For real? Whoa." Ellie looked at him contemplatively. "So you're a carpenter."

"Yep."

 _Okay then. Conversational skills of a brick wall. Got it._

Ellie pushed herself off the stool and meandered in the living room. A box under the coffee table caught her eye. She reached for it, noting the thin layer of dust on the lid.

Tess sauntered into the room, yawning, a pillow tucked under one arm. "What you got there, kid?"

"Scrabble," Ellie said, pleasantly surprised. "I've never played this before."

"Well, Ellie, that changes today."


	3. crepes and conversation

"It's hot out," Tess commented, eyeballing the young girl's long-sleeved shirt, which was beneath another shirt. "You really don't want to change?"

"Yeah."

"You sure?"

"Positive," Ellie announced, bouncing on the balls of her feet and clearly itching to cross the threshold out into the sunshine. "Let's go!"

"Alright, wait in the car," Tess said, fishing her keys out of her pocket. "Catch."

She tossed it to Ellie, who caught it with one hand and twisted the doorknob with the other, pushing the door open with her arm. Tess shook her head, smiling to herself as the girl enthusiastically skipped over to the car. She grabbed a small bottle of water from the fridge and did a quick pat-down of her jeans.

 _Phone? Check. Wallet? Check. Let's go._

The mall had its usual crowded and overly noisy ambience that Tess was never fond of, but witnessing Ellie's excitement about wandering around somehow made her slight vexation dissipate.

"Look at that one!" Ellie exclaimed. "So ridiculous."

Tess, a few steps ahead of her, paused to turn around.

Ellie had stopped in front of a store window, standing with her feet apart and her hands on her hips, with one hip jutting out and her shoulders back, imitating the mannequin on the other side of the glass. Tess glanced at her, and then at the mannequin.

"You nailed it," she chuckled. "That's the third one now."

Ellie took a bow.

"Come on," Tess waved her over. "Let's grab something to eat."

"Okay."

The two got on the escalator and stopped for crepes, with Ellie once again enthused to try things she hadn't before. They walked around the floor with teenybopper songs playing from the mall speakers like tinny background music.

Ellie took a tentative bite of her crepe and, after swallowing, smiled gleefully. "This is good."

"Told you." Tess watched the redhead take another bite with a euphoric look on her face, her big green eyes alight with joy.

"Mm."

They walked around more, peeking in through shops, before Tess mustered the small courage to ask Ellie about herself. "So, tell me about your story, Ellie."

"Mm…" Ellie paused to swallow. "My mom died when I was a baby. Her friend took care of me up until she couldn't anymore, I guess. So I was put in a group home for foster care. I got into my first foster home when I was nine. And… I've basically been house surfing since."

"What about your dad?"

Ellie shrugged. "No clue."

"Ah. What was the group home like?"

"Shitty, as you would expect," she said sardonically. She eyed Tess's long-forgotten crepe. "You gonna finish that?"

Tess handed her the crepe. "You eat fast."

"Thanks."

Tess nodded. "How were the foster homes?"

"Awful," Ellie said noncommittally. "Some were okay, though. Just can't find anyone I click with."

Tess knew she was only getting the skeleton of her story. But she knew this wasn't the time to push her too.

"Well… we seem to be doing alright so far," she said instead, hoping the lightness of her tone disguised her anxiety.

"Yeah," Ellie nodded contemplatively. "Yeah, I guess we are."

Tess didn't miss the wistful look that crossed her face.

* * *

 **a/n:** so sorry it's short! i have exams soon and i have to revise but i wanted to put something up for you guys :) thanks for reading and leaving feedback!


	4. breakfast with the ellie-gizer bunny

"Something the matter?" Tess's voice pulled Joel out of his reverie.

Joel stepped into the bedroom they shared, leaning against the doorframe.

She met his eyes in the mirror on top of the drawers she was standing in front of as she got dressed for the day.

He'd noticed the small changes in her. She was normally hard and reserved, especially in terms of affection – but he found her quite affectionate lately, letting her hands linger too long, being generous with taps and pats and things of the sort. And that was just the tip of the proverbial iceberg. She smiled more often, laughed more often; the fatigue from her day (especially due to her line of work) always seemed to immediately wash away as soon as she stepped into their humble abode, where he and Ellie – mostly Ellie – waited welcomingly. Tess was _happier_.

Joel got the vague idea that this must be 'the Ellie effect.'

After gauging what her reaction might be, he spoke. "You look younger."

"Now what the hell does that mean, old man?" Tess bristled playfully – not quite hiding the teasing edge to her voice.

"You're just… radiant."

"Huh," Tess spun around to face him. "I guess we have Ellie to thank for that."

Joel sighed. He knew he had been quite withstanding and not very receiving towards the new addition to their duo (now turned group).

"You have to try," Tess beseeched him. "Look, there's enough here that you have to feel some sort of obligation to me. So you _try_."

 _Goddammit. Does she think…?_

"Tess, I ain't in this with you just 'cause I feel some _obligation_. Obligation didn't make me agree to this in the first place. Y'know there's no one else I'd be doing this with besides…" he cut himself off. "Besides you."

Tess took a long look at him and sighed.

"What?" he asked self-consciously.

The corners of her mouth turned up. "Nothing. See if Ellie's up, and get dressed, the both of you. I'll be downstairs with breakfast."

No one would disagree that Joel understood Tess better than anyone else. But sometimes, she was an enigma even to him.

"Bossy today," he remarked.

"We got stuff— shit to do."

He chuckled. "Gave up on thinking she'll suddenly develop exemplary behavior?"

Tess rolled her eyes. He left her to her own devices and proceeded to check Ellie's room.

The door was ajar. Pushing it open, he scanned the room from the threshold. "Ellie?"

The bed was empty.

Curiously, the room was still in the same state as it had been when he and Tess readied it for the girl. The only indication that the room had been lived in were the suitcases on the floor, lying haphazardly near the bed, and the poorly-folded pile of unwashed clothes near them.

It was almost like she felt unwelcome.

Joel brushed off the thought, chalking it up to her being with them for only a little over a week. He glanced at the empty bed again. He closed the door, headed back to the room he shared with Tess and got dressed.

He walked downstairs, shoes in hand. He made his way to the living room and sat on the couch to put his shoes on. The sound of conversation reached him from the adjoined kitchen. He finished up and walked over to the room and paused in the doorway.

Tess stood in front of the stove behind the bar, her back to Ellie. The girl sat in the bar with her elbows on the counter, balancing on the hind legs of the barstool as she fiddled with a wallet in her hands.

"So, _Tessa Holmes_ ," she enunciated while rocking her chair. She proceeded to read details aloud from Tess's driver's license.

Tess turned to place a bowl of oatmeal in front of Ellie.

"I'm actually not much of a cook, either," she was saying. "Guess you'll have to make do."

"I like everything you make," Ellie said simply, before putting a spoonful of oatmeal in her mouth to emphasize her point. Tess made a small noise of amusement, while Ellie continued to rock her chair.

Spotting a cup of coffee on the countertop, Joel walked over to the bar.

"You tryin' to break your fool neck?" he took a seat next to Ellie, righting hers in the process and giving her quite a jostle.

"What the f— oh, hey Joel," Ellie greeted, eyes wide in shock. Upon realizing she wasn't in fact about to topple backwards, she relaxed. "It's just you. Damn, I thought I was gonna fall and break my ass! You've gotta stop being so quiet when you walk. Are you really that quiet when you walk? Maybe I'm going deaf? I mean it wouldn't be impossible…"

Joel watched her as she rambled on. How she had so much energy before 9am should be perplexing, but he'd had enough mornings with her to know she had the energy to rival the Energizer Bunny's anytime.

"Uh-huh," he interjected. "Y'know, you could talk a coon right out of a tree."

Ellie scrunched up her nose. "Hmm, I'm gonna take that as an insult."

He gestured to her clothes, comprising of a plain long-sleeved shirt and sweatpants. "You gettin' dressed or are we gonna have to sign you up for school like that?"

She waved him off. "Hold your horses, I'm not done eating yet."

At her attitude, he shot Tess an incredulous look, like; _"You see the jaws on this thing?"_ and Tess shrugged, amused.

"Listen to the lady, Texas," she said.

Ellie grinned and spared him a triumphant look with a milk moustache above her lips, oatmeal on her chin.

He remembered what Tess told him about Ellie when they were at the mall. Joel had to admit, it's not quite fun to give her a hard time on moments like this, when she got to be a kid like she should be.

"Yes ma'am."


	5. photos and a phone call

With Tess at work and no one to actually _talk_ to, Ellie hovered around the living room, humming to herself. She read the certificates hung up in frames. She inspected the bookshelves along the walls. Most of them were of the same categories: business, architecture, engineering and carpentry.

" _Construction Regionalism_ ," she read. "Why are there so many copies of this one?"

"Different volumes," Joel answered from the kitchen table, not looking up from his building plans.

"Oh." Ellie cringed. _Dumbass_. "Yeah, that makes sense."

She ran her finger over the spine of a paperback, head tilted to the side as she read the title silently. _Everything You Need to Know About Creating a Startup_.

"You run a business?" she asked absent-mindedly, not really expecting an answer.

"Hope to," he replied offhandedly.

Surprised, Ellie blinked. There was a lapse of silence.

 _Huh. Well, that's another thing I know now_.

"Cool," she said brightly. "I hope that works out."

"Yeah, me too, kid."

She smiled to herself, noticing the heavy accent.

 _I should probably leave him alone now_ , she thought, amused. _He might explode or something. He has the emotional range of a teaspoon._

She had two more days of freedom before school started. Being stuck in the house with Joel was giving the both of them cabin fever – except it was summer – and so she was looking forward to starting school just to take the edge off.

Ellie meandered over to a shelf in the corner, littered with pictures in frames and little trinkets. An empty frame behind the others caught her eye.

 _Wonder what was in that one._

A few of the photos piqued her interest. One of them was a monochrome portrait of a raven-haired woman with striking doe eyes. A younger Joel was photographed with an elderly couple that must've been his grandparents. One photo showed Joel in his glory days, bright-eyed and smiling, his arm thrown over another young man's shoulders – _So this is his brother Tommy_ , Ellie thought. _They have the same nose_. She saw a photo of Joel in a suit, with his brother in a slightly fancier getup and a blonde woman in a white dress, all beaming at the camera. There was an old sepia photograph of a family; a woman with straw-colored hair sat on the grass with two young boys, all of them in old-fashioned clothes, laughing at a big dog swamping a man with kisses.

Ellie smiled. _Hey, that's little Joel and Tommy!  
_  
There was a picture of a twenty-something Tess with her parents, beaming proudly, young and clad in a toga and a square cap. There was also one of an older Tess, in a café, bundled up in winter clothes. Her gloved hands were wrapped around a paper cup of coffee. She was smirking at the camera, her eyes sparkling with mischief.

 _Cute_. _Joel must've taken it_.

His phone rang, startling her.

"Fuck." Ellie spun in place, alarmed, looking for the source of the sound. By the sounds of it, Joel was doing the same in the kitchen.

"Language."

" _Tch._ " Ellie rolled her eyes. "Yeah, okay."

She spotted the phone on the coffee table.

"There you are, you noisy little thing," Ellie muttered. She grabbed the phone and jogged to the kitchen, handing it over to Joel.

"Hey, little brother."

She took a seat on the table and studied the building plans laid out on the table as Joel talked on the phone. It was a conversation about a building project, with his little brother Tommy. And, apparently, they were due to talk face-to-face.

"Think you're due for a visit," Tommy had said.

Ellie looked up at Joel, eyebrows raised.

"You reckon?" he said as he regarded her apprehensively.

"Well, yeah. Come down here – Maria would love to see y'all," Tommy said jovially.

Ellie thought back to the picture with the woman wearing a white dress. _So that was Maria_.

"Maybe during break," Joel was saying.

"Oh, right, that girl of yours starting school?" Tommy asked. A loud squeal resonated from the other end of the line, followed by loud barking. "Oh, shoot—"

Joel grimaced in wry amusement. "Tara giving you trouble?"

"Yeah, the little one can be a handful," Tommy laughed. "That's my cue to go."

"Alright," Joel said. "You take care down there. Talk later."

"Yep. You too, brother."

"So…" Ellie started. "Are we visiting?"

"You got school," Joel huffed amusedly, sitting back down. "And hands off the papers, kid."

"What? I'm just looking at them." Ellie grinned. "Is this your handwriting? I like it. Classic example of chicken-scratch penmanship."

"I've half a mind to send you upstairs with no dinner."

"As if!" Ellie laughed. "I'll tell on you."

"Yeah?"

"Yep," she said proudly. "Tess can totally take you down in a fight."

"You think so?"

"Uh, I _know_ so." Ellie handed the plans over. "Wanna bet?"

Joel sighed. _It's gonna be a long night._


	6. fight, fight, fight!

Ellie let out a frustrated breath. She had no idea what time it was, let alone where she was supposed to go for homeroom. She'd tried to ask a teacher for directions and he had sped past her with a hurried excuse.

She squared her shoulders. "Whatever. I'll manage just fine on my own."

 _ **Krak!**_

Ellie's feet slid out from under her when a hard blow struck her across the cheek. She landed on her knees, hard. She propped herself up with her elbows by bracing her hands on the ground. She tasted blood in her mouth, saw it drip down to the ground next to her fist. She could feel the rough edges of the cracks in the pavement against the palm of her other hand. Her cheek was rapidly swelling up.

"You gotta be the dumbest new kid to ever step off that bus."

Ellie grimaced. _Fuck, it's that kid again_.

Earlier, within five minutes of stepping into the school, two stocky guys had tried to steal off her, one wearing a vest, and the other a blue shirt. They'd teamed up on her; the guy in the blue shirt landed some good hits, busting her temple with his knuckles. He grabbed her backpack while his buddy held her back. He'd reached inside, and seeing what he pulled out sparked Ellie's anger. She had kicked buddy boy in the kneecap before snatching her things back from Blondie and running off. She had lost her timetable and ripped a sew-on patch from her bag during the scuffle.

She grit her teeth in annoyance.

"Pick her up."

Buddy boy yanked her up into a one-armed chokehold. Her hands instinctively went to his arm, tugging and pulling.

"I warned you not to touch my stuff," she spat. "I would've pulled my punches if I knew how fragile you were."

Blondie grabbed her shirt. "I'm gonna take what I want _and_ I'm going to kick your ass."

"Fight me one on one, you chickenshit," she snarled.

"Keep it up, you little bitch," he growled as he pulled his fist back. A small crowd was starting to gather.

Ellie braced herself for the impact.

Nothing came.

A hand was wrapped around Blondie's wrist. Ellie's gaze followed the hand to its owner: a girl in a red jacket.

"Let's make this fight a bit more fair."

Ellie was dropped onto her knees.

The girl slammed Blondie down to the ground, knocking the wind out of him. Buddy boy lunged at her.

 _ **Whump!**_ He was met with a kick to the stomach. The girl's knee collided with his nose as he doubled over. Ellie heard a sickening crack among the choruses of "Fight, fight, fight!" and "Go, Riley!", and "Kick his ass, Riley!". Buddy boy knelt in the sidelines, clutching his bloody nose, and Blondie was back up on his feet. For a second, at least. The girl's fist shot to his face and another crack resounded.

Next second, she had him on his back again, with a knee on his chest and a foot on his arm. She grabbed him by the collar and growled, "I should stomp your fucking balls."

Blondie's face blanched.

She dropped his shirt and stood. He bolted after buddy boy, who had long since had a running start. The girl watched with her hands on her waist.

Ellie turned to pick up her things. She could feel the girl's eyes on her.

"What spectacular fuckwads. What'd they want?"

"Something not theirs," Ellie replied tersely as she tucked her jacket in her arm and reached for her Walkman. "I had it covered."

"Yeah, I can see that," the girl smirked as she watched Ellie dust it off. "Some advice, get someone to watch your back. Try and make some friends before—"

"Did I ask for your advice?" Ellie snapped, her stuff clutched against her chest.

The girl studied her nails. Ellie studied her.

Finally, the girl turned and stuck her hands in her pockets as she began to walk away. "You got some serious trust issues, new kid."

Ellie scowled. "Yeah. Okay, _Riley_."

"Come on. You don't have all day to stare."

 _Jeez._

Ellie shrugged on her jacket, shouldered her bag and stuffed her Walkman into her pocket. She took off after Riley. "Hey, wait!"

As the pair weaved through the crowds of students, Ellie had gathered some information. One: Riley was a year above her, two: she's popular, and three: she's apparently _really cool_. A lot of people seemed to like Riley. Seemingly countless people had been introduced to Ellie, and she had already forgotten all their names.

Riley had pretty bronze skin, warm brown eyes and full, soft-looking lips. Her dark hair was tied in a low bun. She wasn't carrying anything on her, and that made her cool to people for some reason. _Weird_.

"Okay, here's administration," Riley announced. "Go get your timetable."

Ellie nodded. "Thanks."

"See you around, new kid."

Ellie made it to her first class in time. There was a roll call, introductions were made, T passes were handed out, and the teacher passionately preached about the importance of attendance. Ellie made it in time to her next classes too, thanks to her new trusty timetable. She had been focused – mostly.

 _I should stomp your fucking balls._

As much as it annoyed her to admit it, her thoughts kept going back to Riley and her dumb badassery.

 _I should stomp your fucking balls…_

The bell rang for break, and Ellie startled upright. She neatly packed her things into her bag while the teacher yelled reminders to the class. She stood and squeezed past everyone else out the door, glad to finally stretch her legs and have the feeling come back to her butt. Sitting down for a long period of time had its downsides.

Ellie put her jacket on as she walked down the corridor. She wanted to explore the buildings and commit it to memory. She had no intention of talking to anyone, so she reached into her pocket and—

 _Where…_

"Oh my God, she fucking _stole it!_ "

 _How did she do it?_ Ellie dug the heels of her hands into her cheeks. _How the hell did she do it?_

She groaned in frustration and marched into the cafeteria. Spotting Riley sitting with her friends, she marched herself over to their table.

"Where is it?"

Everyone turned their heads to look at her, eyebrows raised.

"Hey, new kid! How's your first day in hell going?" Riley grinned.

"My Walkman. Give it to me."

Riley turned towards her. "What makes you think I'd take anything of _yours?_ "

Her friends were smiling. Ellie's fists were clenched so tight, her nails dug into her palms. She wanted to wipe that stupid grin off of Riley's stupid face.

"I don't think. I know you took it," Ellie said. "You're a pretty lousy thief."

Riley leveled her with a stare, a smug smile across her lips. Ellie stared back adamantly.

"Fine, new kid," Riley finally said, reaching inside her jacket. She tossed the Walkman out carelessly and Ellie rushed to catch it. "You've got shit taste in music anyway."

Ellie fumed as she walked away.

 _What an asshole._

* * *

 **a/n** : so i basically just sort of rewrote that thing from american dreams. i am publishing this at 4am wow

pls don't get me into trouble ty love u


	7. winston, worm and whiny pissbaby

Ellie sighed in relief as the bell rang, signalling the end of the school day. Normally, she liked school, but it being an Orientation Day of sorts, classes were draggy and idle. Plus she didn't particularly like those lame games teachers used to push kids into introducing themselves to each other and getting them to know one another. She was willing to go so far as to say the best part of the day was the surprise quiz in history class. The worst was probably having pancake butt from sitting around with nothing to do for the most part. She dug into her jacket pocket and felt for her Walkman, only to frown in dismay when thoughts of Riley came back to her.

Finally stepping out of the school bus, she sighed in a mix of exasperation and relief. She hiked her bag further up her shoulders and started walking.

"Hey, new kid!" came a call from behind her.

"Fuck," Ellie cursed under her breath. "Did I summon her or something?"

Quick footsteps reached her and a hand clumsily covered hers. Ellie turned her head and narrowed her eyes at the girl, scowled and yanked her hand away. "Dude!"

Riley scoffed at the look on her face. "Jeez, are you ever not serious?"

"What are you doing here?" Ellie asked, irate. She faced forward and kept walking.

"I live nearby," Riley replied matter-of-factly, catching up to stroll beside her.

Ellie spared her an unimpressed glance. "What do you want?"

The girl simply grinned. "You're so hostile. Chill out, Ellie."

Ellie froze in her tracks. "How do you know my name?"

"I have my ways," Riley said, still flippant. "Damn, you really have some serious trust issues."

"Yeah, well, sorry for not taking kindly to some wack girl who stole my Walkman."

"You got me there."

Ellie glared at her. "Whatever."

"You know iPods are a thing, right?"

"Fuck off."

"Jesus, why are you so upset? You got it back."

" _Tch._ "

Riley sighed exaggeratedly.

Ellie threw her arms up, exasperated. "What do you want from me?"

"There's something you need to see, and we're never gonna get anywhere if you keep acting like a whiny _pissbaby_ , Ellie," Riley said, taking her hand. "Now come on!"

A gleeful laugh escaped Riley's lips as she pulled Ellie along, ignoring her protests ("I can walk!") the whole way.

Ellie tugged her hand away as they came to a stop. Riley had led her to a music store. 'RadioActive', the sign read.

"Whoa."

"Pretty cool, hey?"

"It looks… old."

"Kids nowadays call it _vintage_." Riley quipped sardonically. She grabbed Ellie's hand once again. "Come on!"

"Stop taking my hand!"

Riley merely laughed as she pulled the door open with one hand and dragged Ellie inside. There was a chime as the door closed, standing out against the smooth jazz that played in the shop. One side of the store was teeming with CDs and the like, the other with instruments.

"Winston," Riley greeted the man behind the register.

He nodded at her in acknowledgement. Cold, calculating blue eyes swept over Ellie's frame. "She one of your friends?"

"Yep, I'd say so."

"Ellie," the redhead asserted amiably. "I'm with stupid."

"Pleased to meet you, Ellie," Winston grinned. He turned his gaze to Riley. "No funny business this time, kid. I mean it."

Ellie's eyebrows knitted in confusion when Riley scoffed beside her. "That was a year ago! And I wasn't even the offender."

Winston huffed.

"Ellie here has lived a very sheltered life," Riley announced theatrically. "She has things to see."

Winston's stern gaze gave way to an eye roll.

"Come on, Ellie," Riley chirped, leading Ellie towards the back corner of the shop, snagging a vinyl as they passed.

"This here's a record player, fair lady," she mused, gesturing to a clunky device sitting on the corner table.

"Yeah, I know what gramophones are," Ellie said, a bit irritably. She watched as Riley replaced the previous record.

Riley placed the new record over the platter, flicked a switch to put it into motion, and lifted the tonearm above the outer edge of the record. She carefully dropped the needle and a few seconds of silence passed before music filled the room. Ellie found herself nodding to the tune.

 _Oh yeah, I'll tell you something_

 _I think you'll understand_

 _When I say that something_

 _I wanna hold your hand_

 _I wanna hold your hand_

 _I wanna hold your hand_

"You like it?" Riley asked.

"Hmm," she hummed. She met Riley's eyes then, and she was surprised to find uncertainty in them. Riley had always seemed so easy-going and carefree. Ellie grinned reassuringly. "Yeah. It's pretty cool."

"I figured." Riley's smile was back. "The Beatles. Check them out."

"The Beatles. Okay."

"You know, I usually don't bring people here."

"Is that what you say to everyone else?" Ellie mockingly asked, smiling lightly.

"Shut up," Riley snorted. "No, it's not like that. Winston's a tightass."

"I'd say he's got a pretty good reason to be," Ellie teased.

Riley hummed. "I brought my friend Christina here once. You've seen her, we hang all the time. Anyway, she nearly knocked over all the stands. She's too chicken to show her face here ever again."

Ellie thought back to Winston's calculating, stormy blue eyes. "I think I would be too, if I were her."

"Ha. Chicken."

Ellie rolled her eyes. "Pfft. Yeah, okay. Have you ever even seen chickens? Those things can totally fuck you up. Like, they have blades for claws."

Riley gave her a long, incredulous stare, before bursting out into laughter. "Man, that's so specific. Are you okay?"

"I'm just saying," Ellie said weakly.

" _Okay_ ," Riley stifled another laugh. "Let's dance!"

Ellie shook her head. "You're crazy."

Riley grabbed both her hands and pulled her into a dance, swaying and pulling and shuffling her around.

 _Yeah, you've got that something_

 _I think you'll understand_

 _When I feel that something_

 _I wanna hold your hand_

 _I wanna hold your hand_

 _I wanna hold your hand_

 _I wanna hold your hand..._

The song ended and Riley dropped her hands to take the record off, sliding it back into its sleeve. Ellie let her arms hang limply on her sides and watched as Riley put Winston's jazz record back on.

"Fun, huh?" Riley asked. She turned to face Ellie, grinning.

"A little."

Riley elbowed her. "You loved it."

"Yeah, okay, I did," Ellie admitted, a smile spreading across her features.

"Let's go – I have something else to show you."

She nodded and followed Riley out of the shop, the two of them calling their thanks and goodbyes over their shoulders. The door chimed as it shut behind them and they took off, Ellie trailing behind Riley.

"Where are we going?"

"You'll see. Think you can catch up?" Riley said, smirking, before breaking into a run through an empty park.

"Oh man," Ellie sighed, taking off after her. "Riley, wait up!"

By the time she reached the clearing beyond the park, Riley was already hiking her way up a small hill.

"Are you kidding me?" Ellie groused as she began her trip upwards.

Riley stopped to wait at the top of the slope, hands on her hips. "Come on, bitch, we don't have all day."

"Yeah, yeah." Ellie pushed herself up onto the edge where Riley stood. She hauled herself onto her feet and took closer step, when she lost her balance and nearly tipped over into a sunken center. "Riley—"

Riley's hands instinctively shot out to steady her. "I got you."

"What the hell?" Ellie blurted out, her face hot for some reason she couldn't pinpoint. "There's a freaking _crater_ on this hill."

"Yeah," Riley flashed her another smile. "It's cool, though. It's nice to sit on."

Ellie sighed. "I'm going to regret this, but how did you find this place?"

"I don't know, I just did," Riley shrugged noncommittally, pushing her away from the edge of the hilltop.

"Oh."

"I come here sometimes, to think about stuff."

"So, this is like some secret lair or something."

"Yeah," Riley said, a strangely solemn expression on her face. "Seeing it's not secret anymore… I have to kill you now."

"Oh no," Ellie said monotonously, managing to hold her flat expression before smiling.

Riley shook her head. "You're a terrible actress."

"Oh well. Everyone's a critic."

"Hey, I almost forgot," Riley exclaimed abruptly. She sank down to sit, crossing her legs in front of her and dragging her bag onto her lap to rummage inside it. Ellie carefully sat down and watched in curiosity as Riley pulled out two cassette tapes and waved them in the air triumphantly. "Here you go."

She tossed them onto Ellie's lap.

"What's this?" she asked incredulously.

Riley raised an eyebrow. "They're tapes."

"Fuck you," Ellie laughed a little. There was a weird feeling in her chest and it was making her smile uncontrollably. "I _know_ , I mean—"

"I thought they might make you less of a pissbaby," Riley teased.

"Hey, I'm not a pissbaby."

"Sure." Riley crossed her arms beneath her head and laid down.

A moment later, Ellie mimicked her, red hair stirring up the dirt. The late afternoon sun cast a warm glow over their side of the world, setting everything on fire. The tops of the trees looked like silhouetted embers, standing out against the horizon.

"Riley?"

"Yeah."

"Thank you. Seriously."

Riley rolled over and gently flicked Ellie's nose. "Okay."

"I'm trying to say thanks," Ellie continued through a scrunched up expression.

"That's cute," Riley chuckled. Ellie shot her an irate look. "Jeez. Okay, no problem, dork."

"Okay."

Riley pushed herself up on her elbows and stood up up to dust herself off. "Aren't your parents looking for you?"

"It's 4pm."

"Are you in trouble with them?"

"No," Ellie said coolly. "They're foster parents, I don't think–"

"Yeah." Riley was nodding absently before her head snapped up. She turned around to look at Ellie, surprised. "You live with Joel and Tess?"

Ellie nodded, bemused. "Why?"

"I just heard they took in a foster kid a few weeks ago." Riley shrugged. "Turns out it was you. Damn."

"Didn't know they were ever the talk of the town."

Riley rolled her eyes. "She's a cop and he's… actually, I don't even know. Everyone just seems to know him. He's a big scary man."

"Big scary man."

"Let's go." Riley held her hands out to Ellie. She grabbed them and let Riley help her up onto her feet. The two trudged down the hill and into the park, positively exhausted.

"Hey, look!" said Riley, suddenly enthused. She dropped her bag and ran towards a spot in the grass.

Ellie followed, sighing. Her hands were dirty and her feet needed a break. "Stop doing that."

"What?"

"You keep leaving me behind, you _worm_ ," Ellie said. "What's that behind your— hey! What the…? Riley!"

She was getting soaked. Riley had two water guns pointed at her, and she was mercilessly squeezing the triggers.

"Riley, stop," Ellie snapped irritably.

"No way!" Riley cackled, refusing to cease fire. "This is too good!"

"I'm going to destroy you," Ellie snatched a water gun from her, a little less annoyed, and an all-out water gun fight ensued.

As all water gun fights end, theirs did with both of them drenched and winded.

From her eagle-spread position on the grass, Riley said, "We should probably get going. It's getting kind of late."

"What about these?" Ellie asked, holding up her water gun.

"Let's just leave them," said Riley.

"Okay."

Riley grunted with effort as she sat up. "Let's go. I'll walk you home."

Ellie pushed herself up and let out a noise of amusement as she watched Riley dust herself off. "You have grass on your ass."

"You have mud on yourself. Swamp monster."

The pair strolled across the park and into the street in comfortable silence.

"Well, this is me," Ellie sighed as they came to a stop in front the house she lived in. "Will you be fine going home?"

"Yeah, I told you I live close," Riley said plainly, stepping in front of the driveway with Ellie behind her, studying the house. "I live right down the street."

"Mm. Well… this was awesome," Ellie remarked, pausing a few steps in front of her. "Thanks."

Riley turned around and shot her a smile. "Don't mention it. Now get inside before we get old."

Ellie's sneaker caught on a crack in the concrete, sending her tripping right into Riley. "Shit. Sorry."

"Are you putting the moves on me?" Riley teased, poking the other girl's stomach.

"Hey—stop – ugh, shut up," she spluttered, cheeks flushed.

"What?" Riley laughed. "You malfunctioned for a second there."

"I said shut up," Ellie muttered, throwing a light punch on her shoulder.

"Okay, okay. I should go."

"Yeah."

Riley smiled and turned around, calling over her shoulder, "See you tomorrow!"

Ellie watched her disappear from view before running up to the porch and ringing the doorbell. After a few moments, the door opened.

"Hey."

Joel scoped her muddy form before raising an eyebrow at her.

"What?" Ellie asked innocently.


	8. this could be our own

"What the hell happened to your face?"

"I fell," Ellie said lamely. She had completely forgotten about the scuffle earlier that day. Smiling sheepishly, she slipped past Joel, tracking mud into the house.

"You're makin' a mess," Joel groused disapprovingly as he closed the door.

"Yeah, yeah, I'll clean it up in a minute," she said, kicking her shoes off on the doormat while he left for the kitchen.

Ellie headed for the stairs, but just as she stepped foot into the living room, Joel's gruff voice reached her ears.

"Ellie, c'mere."

Groaning internally, Ellie marched herself into the kitchen to find Joel standing in front of the sink, wringing out a small towel. She sat on a barstool and rested her elbows on the countertop, chin on the palms of her hands as she watched him work.

"Where've you been?" Joel asked, walking towards the counter and handing her the towel.

She was quiet for a moment.

"Outside."

He sighed, gesturing to her face. "You mind explaining all that?"

Ellie gave a small start and clumsily tried to rub off whatever it was he saw on her face. The towel came away with mud and a smudge of dried blood.

Joel restlessly took it from her. "Boy or girl?"

Her eyebrows rose in surprise.

"Boys," she answered after a beat of silence. She had prepared herself for a scolding that never came.

"Hope they look worse than you do," was his remark, which made her look up and grin. He lifted her chin with his fingers and gently dabbed at the wound on her forehead, careful not to scrape at the broken skin. It took a little bit for the dried blood to give and start coming off. "You know their names?"

"No. And I'm not a tattletale."

Mostly because it was pointless.

"You know we could move you to a different school," said Joel.

Ellie scoffed. "Pfft. I'm not scared of them."

The corners of his mouth twitched up. He looked amused, but she could see the concern lingering in his eyes.

"Okay," he withdrew his hand and tapped her chin. "You should be fine."

"I am." Ellie straightened up and caught sight of the blood on the towel, eyes widening in surprise. It looked like there was more blood than there should be.

"Yeah, head wounds bleed a lot," Joel said, as if he'd read her mind. "Try to get hit somewhere else next time."

She laughed in spite of herself.

Joel turned to wash the towel in the sink. "Alright, go get cleaned up for dinner."

"Yes sir," she said with a mock salute.

 _Well, he handled that like a pro_ , she thought.

Ellie slid off her seat and made a beeline for her room, taking the stairs two steps at a time. She headed to the bathroom for a quick shower, washing off the day from her mind and the dirt from her limbs and her hair. As she was drying off and getting dressed, Joel called from downstairs.

"Ellie?"

"Yeah?" she called back, her voice reverberating off the bathroom walls.

"I'm going out for a bit. We're out of carrots."

"What?"

"Don't open the door for strangers."

"Wait!" Ellie hurriedly pulled her shirt on and scrambled to get down the stairs, almost breaking a leg in the process.

Joel was half in and half out the door, an expectant expression on his face. "What is it?"

"I'm coming with you," Ellie said, coming to a clumsy stop in front of him. Joel eyed her hair, dripping wet and tangled.

"No you're not."

"Ugh. You're leaving me alone with the stove on?"

"I'll be back in five minutes." Joel sighed.

"Five minutes," Ellie repeated firmly. She stared at him as she closed the door, calling out loudly from inside, "Four minutes and 59 seconds..."

Joel shook his head. _What a weird kid._

* * *

After sorting out a shoplifting incident, Tess had just laid her hands on the steering wheel of the squad car when her dispatcher had sent her to address a car crash. In the blink of an eye, she informed her that she was en route, lights and sirens on.

When she arrived on the scene mere minutes later, it was in complete chaos. Two cars appeared to have collided at a T-junction. A Plymouth Barracuda had rammed into the side of an SUV. The air reeked of burnt chemical, of fire and gasoline. Shards of glass glittered on the asphalt. A big crowd was beginning to gather.

She was thankful that there was already an ambulance at the scene.

Tess watched paramedics talk to a bloodied young driver in one of the vehicles as firefighters try to get him out of the Plymouth along with his girlfriend.

There was a driver in the other vehicle, too. He wasn't moving. No one was trying to help him.

Her heart dropped.

She then registered the wailing; a woman stood a few feet away from the car, clutching her crying daughter tightly. A pair of paramedics were trying their best to check them for injuries. The girl looked no older than twelve.

Tess felt sick to her stomach.

But she was trained to be stoic. She turned away from the scene to talk to a few paramedics, though she was only confirming what she already knew — the crash involved a fatality.

One of the firefighters draped a fire blanket over the deceased person's car as she cordoned off the site with crime scene tape.

As if on autopilot, Tess methodically called for a traffic homicide investigator, rounded up some witnesses, took statements, and worked to identify the drivers. She briefed the traffic homicide investigator when he arrived and he took over the investigation.

She needed to notify families. Back at the station, she took the chance to notify her own. She called the house phone, expecting Joel to pick up.

"Hello?" Ellie's voice crackled into her ear.

"Hey, Ellie. It's Tess."

"Oh. Hi." Confusion seeped into Ellie's usually optimistic tone. "Is everything okay?"

"Yeah, don't worry," Tess said. "You guys have dinner yet?"

"No, Joel went out to pick up some stuff, but he said he'll be back soon."

"Oh, great." Out of the corner of her eye, she saw one of her colleagues headed towards her. "I gotta go, sweetie. Take care, okay?"

"Okay. Bye!"

The new intern approached her as she hung the phone back on the receiver.

"Hey, Emily. You've been here the whole day?"

"No, my shift started at 1. Rough day?"

Tess quickly relayed the details to her jadedly, and she shared her sympathy towards the situation, even offering to help with the report.

"Coffee?" she asked, offering Tess a steaming cup. She held some directories and records on one arm.

"Thanks."

"No problem," Emily said kindly, the smile lines around her brown eyes creasing. "You look like you need it."

It had been nine hours since her shift started, and she really could use it. "You have no idea."

Emily joined the crew two months ago on a work placement apprenticeship from a college intern program. She fit right in with her tough but easygoing attitude.

"No, Ma'am, you cannot just walk into — _Grimes!_ "

Their heads turned towards the front desk where another squad member, Florence, who was on administrative duty was scrambling to stop a hysterical woman from lashing out. They shared a look before shaking their heads as Lieutenant Grimes came rushing past them.

"So was that your kid?" Emily asked.

Tess nodded. "You could say that."

"Oh yeah, your first foster. How old is she?"

"Fourteen."

"She's quite young," Emily remarked. "My little sister's fourteen as well. You have a picture?"

"Yeah, actually," Tess grabbed her phone and scrolled through the photos, which consisted mostly of paperwork. She tapped on the thumbnail that stood out and showed the screen to Emily.

It was a candid shot of Ellie at breakfast that morning, in her pyjamas, thrilled about her discovery of toaster waffles.

Emily smiled. "She's cute."

"Yeah, she's a good kid."

The lieutenant walked back with the frantic civilian in tow, stopping in front of the two. The woman impatiently headed for his office, lit cigarette in hand.

"Lieutenant Grimes," they acknowledged him.

He nodded. "Good job today, guys. Pretty loaded day."

"Yeah." Tess eyed the woman pacing his office before returning her gaze to him. "What's that all about?"

Lieutenant Grimes shook his head. "I don't know yet, but as far as I know, her daughter is missing."

"Another missing girl?" Emily looked at the woman sadly. "I hope it works out well."

"Yeah," Tess said. She frowned. "I hope it doesn't have something to do with that creepy old man."

"I hope not," Grimes sighed. "It's been a long day. You look overtired. Your shift's over, go home to that daughter of yours."

"I still have to—"

"I'll take care of it," he said, firm but reassuring. "Take care, Tess."

"Thanks, Grimes."

* * *

Ellie jumped out of her seat as soon as she heard the telling sound of a car door close, meeting Joel at the front door. "Hey, there you are!"

"Here I am," Joel deadpanned. He closed the door behind him with his foot as Ellie rushed to help with the bags. "You set anything on fire?"

"No. And you said five minutes. That was more like fifty!"

He scoffed. "I was gone for fifteen."

"Oh yeah, Tess called," Ellie said as they carried the bags to the kitchen.

"What'd she say?" he asked.

"Not much. She was probably expecting you to answer."

"Maybe. Put these in the pantry," Joel said, taking the carrots out of the bag before handing it to her.

Ellie went about putting away the groceries as he went back to dinner. She unpacked the bags and neatly organized the contents in the shelves.

"Peeps Minis," she read aloud curiously as she held the bag of sweets. "Sour watermelon? Is this candy?"

"Yes," he replied, taking up the rest of the groceries since she was too distracted.

He had gotten them on a whim when he passed the candy aisle, at the thought that he had someone back at home who would share the hype. He hadn't bought anything of the sort for years – he didn't even know they had Peeps all year round now.

"Holy shit, Joel! These are baby chickens!"

"You can try them after dinner."

"Or I can try them now," Ellie said, her excitement apparent on her face.

"Don't spoil your appetite," he warned.

Ellie was already tearing the top off the bag, reaching inside.

"Here," she tossed him a marshmallow before taking one for herself. A smile spread across her lips as she chewed. "Holy cow, this is good."

Joel chuckled. "Yeah. They used to be holiday candy. Apparently you can have them all year round now."

Ellie put them away longingly while he got started on dinner, and helped him set the table for three. They heard the lock turn and the front door open as he was putting the food on the table.

Tess walked into the room a few moments later, weary and haggard. But the scene that greeted her put a smile on her face.

"Hey," Joel said. "You're right on time."

She gave him a one-armed hug and a kiss on the cheek, and Ellie mimed covering her eyes.

"Hey, sweetie," she greeted, ruffling Ellie's damp hair. "How was your first day?"

"Not so bad," Ellie said, poised to tell them all about her day – or most of it. "Hey, do you guys know The Beatles?"

"Yeah," Tess replied. "Old, but pretty good."

Joel nodded. "Real old."

The girl looked between them incredulously. "How old?"

"Kid, you weren't even alive," said Joel, amused.

Tess had pushed the horrors of the day into the back of her mind, reassured by their presence. She smiled at the picture in front of her, content.


	9. and i've always been a daughter

"Hey, get back here! Someone stop that guy!"

Ellie, startled, shoved some ridiculous teen magazine she had been eyeballing back into its rack and looked up just in time to see a man sprinting towards her direction at lightning speed. In a moment of slight panic and uncertainty, she stuck her leg out just as he ran past. He effectively tripped and fell to the ground, skidding to a stop about two feet away. A mere moment later, a younger boy was standing over him. He yanked a handbag out of the man's grip and whacked him over the head a few times with it.

"That's – my – bag – you – asshole!"

A few people had gathered around the man, clucking and tutting and waving their hands angrily about.

The boy flipped his hair quite melodramatically and sighed in annoyance. He turned to face Ellie, clutching the bag to his chest as he walked towards her. He gave her a grateful expression. "Oh my God, girl! Thank you!"

"No problem." Ellie smiled.

"I'm Justin," he said, holding his hand out.

Justin had dark, hooded eyes, suntanned skin and black hair. He had an accent that sounded typically American, but not really.

She reached over and shook his hand. "Ellie."

"Love it!" Justin said exuberantly. "Alright, Ellie. Come with me."

"Oh! Um... okay." Ellie trailed off as he grabbed her wrist and tugged her along, out of the crowded supermarket.

Justin led her to a fancy-looking popcorn shop, where he proceeded to yell "Oh my God, guess what?" as soon as they stepped across the threshold, making everyone's heads turn. A young woman behind the register, whom Ellie assumed was his sister, shot him an exasperated look as the costumers went back to minding their own business.

She asked him a question, sounding irritated, but Ellie didn't understand – she had spoken in a different language.

"Where's Mama?" Justin asked instead of responding. The girl rolled her eyes and gestured to the door behind her. Justin took Ellie's wrist again and pulled her along to the back.

"That was my sister Julie," he said as they walked. "She might look like a bitch, but she's nice once you get to know her."

Ellie laughed into her free hand.

A plump woman with a kind face peered at them once they walked into the back room. Ellie immediately knew she was Justin's mother. The woman shot her a friendly smile before turning her gaze to Justin as they walked over to her.

"Oh my God, Ma, guess what happened," he said, before going on to tell her about the encounter with the man at the grocery store. "Anyway, this girl saved my Chanel! Mama, this is Ellie. Ellie, this is my mom, Josie."

"It's nice to meet you," Ellie said, smiling.

"Yes, you too!" Josie took the redhead's face in her hands, patting her cheeks. "How old are you?"

"Fourteen."

Justin continued to gush about her, while his mother went above and beyond with showing their gratitude. Before Ellie knew it, she had a fancy tub of white cheddar cheese popcorn in her hands with a ribbon and a business card stuck on top; Josie had asked her to consider working there, whenever she wanted to.

Justin and his sister dropped her off at Joel's house, where she spent the rest of her Friday night curled up on the couch with a movie that she said she wouldn't finish without Joel and Tess.

She figured it was okay, since they rarely saw each other most nights and she was left home alone. They even celebrated Joel's birthday late, at 3am on the 27th of September – Ellie had woken up and insisted they celebrate right then with presents and the not-so-surprise birthday cake she and Tess had made.

By the time the nights started to get a bit chilly, the little makeshift family had settled into a new routine. School days commenced at 7:30 and ended at 2:30 for Ellie – she left the house at five everyday (to deliver the newspapers) – never bothering to wake either Tess or Joel. Tess worked 10-hour shifts most days from three-thirty, and Joel usually started work at 4pm in a nine to five routine. They systemically left home at 3pm, just in time to see Ellie walking up the street to their house and exchange hellos and goodbyes.

Ellie never liked being home alone. She liked it better when they had days off. Tess answered her endless questions and told her stories, which Joel also did, albeit less frequently.

Joel often came home to a pitch-dark house with Ellie curled up on the couch, her workbooks scattered on the floor. He had woken her up the first time, but after witnessing her almost fall down the stairs, he had been carrying her up to her room since. On the rare mornings where they saw each other, Ellie would tell them about the chronicles of falling asleep on the couch and magically waking up in bed.

He was expecting tonight to be one of those nights, but he came home to a half-awake Ellie on the sofa, wrapped up in a blanket and staring at the television, the lights dancing across her face.

"Scoot."

"Hey." Ellie moved to make room for him on the couch, noticeably more alert. "Had fun at work?"

"Well," he decided to humor her, sitting down with a relieved sigh. "You ain't there, so."

"Okay," said Ellie, rolling her eyes. "Ha-ha."

He shook his head, chuckling. "What are you still doin' up?"

She shrugged. "I was waiting for you."

"That a fact?" Joel discreetly glanced at the clock. It was a quarter after one.

There was a beat of radio silence, filled by the buzz of dialogue coming from the television.

"I'm sorry." Ellie's eyes were trained on the screen. "About yesterday."

"Ellie—"

"No, I wanna talk about it."

Joel suspired a drawn-out sigh. It was quite the subject, but it was almost laughably cliché how the situation had unfolded.

Ellie, in her unbearable boredom, had decided to explore the basement last night. She came across old photos and her curiosity got the better of her. He had come home as she sat on the couch gazing at an old photo of a girl whom she later found out was Sarah. Long story short, it made for a very quiet night save for the argument that had ensued. Joel brooded in the living room, and Ellie went upstairs worried sick that her nosy ass was getting booted out and placed somewhere else.

Ellie had finished speaking by the time Joel pulled himself out of his thoughts – but it was okay. They were okay.

"Well," he said. "No matter how hard you try, I guess you can't escape your past."

"Yeah!" she nodded, a little too fast. "But I still mean what I said. I can't imagine losing someone you love like that. Losing everything that you know. I really am sorry, Joel."

Ironic, he thought sadly, coming from a girl like her. He recalled his accusation – it seemed so ignorant now that he had had time to think about it. Ultimately, they shared the same pain, however different the circumstances were.

"It's okay, Ellie."

"Oh, by the way…" Ellie launched into an explanation about picking up small jobs or doing chores for the neighbors. Joel wasn't listening. His mind was somewhere else; in Austin, Texas, sitting on a worn leather couch just before midnight, in what seemed like a lifetime ago. Some nights were like this with Sarah – he just wanted to sleep and she just wanted to talk.

 _Sarah._ Her smile lit up in the back of Joel's mind, and he was reminded that she was his reason for doing this in the first place.

Joel supposed it was just pure luck that they ended up with Ellie, a hurricane of a girl with a switchblade attitude. She was a little rough around the edges; fluent in potty mouth and forewent her manners at times, but on the contrary, she had that laudable openness and childlike exuberance. She was intelligent and naturally curious and eager to learn about pretty much everything, yet she still skipped over lines on the tiles and the sidewalk, hummed while doing her chores and watched cartoons on Saturday mornings while eating cereal. How she was so _bright_ and optimistic despite the childhood she'd had, he didn't know. He hoped she could stay wrapped up in innocence. While it had been strange getting used to Ellie's company – it had been so long since he had been a father, after all – he thought her endearing (although quite vexing) in her own little way. It had only been a short time, but he found that he cared for her, and Tess had been way ahead of him. He decided, good or bad, he would embrace every moment with his girls.

"…Henry and Sam always need help with their garden. Oh, you know Mrs MacGuff? She lives right next door and she's nice. I've been walking her dogs." Ellie paused, noticing the preoccupied look on his face. "Joel? Is everything okay?"

"Yep," he said. "Just thinkin'."

"By the way…" Ellie grabbed the tub of popcorn on the coffee table. "Try this. It's really good."

"And where'd you get this?"

"Oh man, you should've been there. I was at the mall and this guy Justin almost got his bag stolen – but I kinda helped him get it back." Ellie went on to elaborate as they snacked on the popcorn. "So yeah, he took me to this shop and it turns out his mom owns it. I think. She gave me this. And, she said whenever I wanted to I could go and help out. I'm trying to save up for a bike, so that'll be good, right?"

Joel raised an eyebrow. "You could've mentioned you needed a bike."

"Okay, maybe I don't _need_ it," Ellie said, "but it'd make my paper route easier. And hey, that's not even the point!"

"Paper—?" Joel balked. "Jesus, girl, how many jobs do you have?"

Ellie laughed. "Just that one. It's okay, right?"

"Fine," he sighed. "As long as you're careful."

"Of course I am," she waved him off. "So, how about—"

"Hey, look at that, it's way past your bedtime."

"Pfft. I'm not even tired." Ellie insisted, sinking back into the couch and digging her sock-covered cold feet under his lap to steal some warmth.

But the next time he caught a glance of her, she was fast asleep, the very picture of peace and innocence. Joel swept her up into his arms, braced her against his chest and dutifully carried her upstairs to her room.

He grunted with effort as he pushed the covers aside with one arm and lowered Ellie onto her bed as gently as possible. He tucked her in and dropped a kiss on her hair.

"Goodnight, babygirl."


	10. the vanishing of ellie williams

**an:** HELLO i'm aware this is really short... not even 500 words... but i'm nearly finished with the entire thing! i just decided to take this from a chapter, make it its own chapter and put it up,, idk why but i was so keen? it's prob a bad idea but o well :-/ ig i wanted u guys to know i'm still alive and haven't abandoned this

anyway i got a job and i started uni last month so i rarely have time to do stuff :( thank u for sticking with this story love u hope u enjoy reading this one

* * *

"Hey, Riley, wait up."

Riley craned her neck to look behind, surprised. "Ellie! Where were you this morning? I didn't think you even made it to school."

"Sorry." The redhead shouldered past a younger kid to walk next to her. "I got here second period."

"No, it's fine. You okay?"

"Yeah," Ellie answered dismissively. "Let's go home."

Among the crowd of students by the gates, they stepped out into the street, walking side by side in silence. The road was busy, bustling with cars and people under the afternoon sun. Ellie's mind was racing. The day before, she had seen two men in a car idling in front of the school gates, felt their eyes on her until she disappeared inside the building. She'd seen one of them this morning from her window, conspicuously parked across the street. Was all of that just a coincidence? Maybe she was overthinking. Maybe—

" _Whoa!_ "

Ellie was pulled from her thoughts, quite literally – Riley's fist was curled in the hem of her shirt. They had reached the crossing. If it weren't for Riley holding her back, she would've walked right into traffic.

"Thanks," she said, her voice tight.

"Dude, are you sure you're okay?" Riley asked, firm and insistent.

"Sorry, I was distracted."

"Stop apologizing," Riley sighed, her grip on Ellie's jacket coming loose. She took her hand instead. "Are you alright?"

"Yeah. All good."

The sign turned green and the timer began to tick. Ellie looked around their surroundings as they crossed, avoiding eye contact with her.

"So, why didn't I see you at lunch? Are you having a bad day or something?" Riley pressed.

"No."

Ellie heard Riley's sigh of exasperation behind her.

"Okay. Swear you won't think I'm crazy," she demanded, turning around and coming to a stop in the middle of the street. A sea of people passed her by with glaring eyes, yet she stood still.

"I already think you are." Riley urgently tugged at her hand. "What are you doing? Let's go!"

Ellie sighed and willingly let herself be pulled along. "Fine. Never mind."

A car whizzed past right as they stepped onto the curb, packed with other students and pedestrians.

"By the way," Riley said, "before I forget – Winston asked me to give you something."

"So you can stop wherever you want but when I do it, I'm 'crazy'," Ellie deadpanned.

"Ha-ha. _Anyway_. This one's pretty cool, actually. Wait a sec." Riley slid her bag off one shoulder and rummaged through it as she walked. "Here, since you like them so much… The Beatles' blue album, 1967 to 1970. It's got _All You Need Is Love_ on Side A. Ah, got it. Here we go."

Riley looked up, the boxed cassette tape in her held out hand, but her friend was nowhere to be seen.

"Ellie?"


	11. the dust has only just begun to fall

It was a dreary afternoon in late November, and Tess felt like the world had just been swept out from under her feet.

Riley shifted in her seat. The movement caught Tess's eye and brought her attention back to the situation at hand.

"Pardon?" she addressed the investigating officer, realizing he had asked a question.

"Does she usually pull stunts like this?" he repeated with a sigh.

"No," Tess snapped, giving rise to a moment of stunned silence.

After the incident, they had notified the foster organization's social staff, filed a police report as soon as possible and were told that they would be updated after the initial enquiries. It had been three days and Ellie still hasn't been found, despite all her (and Joel's) efforts to search for her. At this point, she was so full of frustration she could burst.

"Nothing like this," she said, more evenly.

"So no clothes, food, or other items missing from home?"

"She couldn't have run away," Tess said firmly.

"And… Riley, was it? Could you describe the last time you saw her?" an investigating officer asked Riley.

"I told you," the girl said frustratedly. "We were walking home from school, and we stopped for something. I looked up and she was just _gone_. I ran to her house and got Mr Miller. That's everything I know."

"Okay, so," the investigating officer said. "What, she just… vanished? That's alarming."

Riley raised a challenging eyebrow at him.

"So we all agree this is a high-risk case," Tess said.

The lieutenant's mouth was a hard line. "Hold on a minute—"

"It's been over 72 hours." He knew she was trying to sound collected and level, but he could hear the urgency and agitation in her voice. "This isn't like her, it's obviously not simple misadventure, and—"

"And that investigation on the missing kids is still a thing," Emily interjected. The room fell silent, and numerous pairs of eyes were on her like a spotlight. She shrugged nervously. "I'm just saying."

Next minute, the lieutenant was deploying police officers and appointing an investigator alongside the search party.

"We'll find that girl of yours," Grimes said, to which Tess nodded in numb acknowledgement. "We'll be doing our best."

"What's our press strategy here?" he asked. "News announcements, posters?"

"I want to help," Riley piped up.

"You've helped enough, Miss Abel," said Grimes. "Thank you."

The lieutenant shot Emily a pointed look as he patted the girl on the shoulder. "Em?"

" _Oh_. Oh, no, no – I'll be fine," Riley stammered, queasy at the thought of being driven home in a squad car, even though her parents already have knowledge about her involvement in the matter.

"Don't worry," Emily flashed her a reassuring smile. "I'll take care of everything. Come on."

Riley bit her lip and followed the woman hesitantly.

"I want the Missing Persons Bureau and Child Services notified, if they haven't been already," the lieutenant said, before turning to Tess. "We're here if you need any kind of support. Do me a favor and go home, alright? You could use a break."

Tess drove out in the falling snow, her heart in her throat.

She came home to a cold and empty house. A harsh contrast from what she had grown accustomed to in the past few months. No pair of sneakers to trip on by the door. No welcome greeting. No loud conversation, albeit one-sided at times. Grey sunlight filtered in through her silhouette in the doorway and the windowsills brimming with snow. Standing in the way of the dim light, Tess realized; home isn't a place – it's a feeling.

She closed the door and pocketed the keys.

Having walked around for a while, Tess found his truck at a nearby park. He stood at the sidewalk, seemingly observing a man inspecting game in his front yard with a rifle.

"Hey, big guy."

Joel turned to face her, weary-eyed, but she could tell by his expression that he was full of resolve.

"Any chance you could get us into that house?" he asked grimly as Tess approached.

"I'll need a warrant. That could take some time." Her brows knitted in concern. "Why, what's going on?"

Tess followed his line of sight, trying to see whatever it was that raised his suspicion. She locked eyes with the man in the yard, who quickly broke eye contact and ducked inside the house, leaving the dead deer behind.

"He _is_ acting weird." _Maybe because it's not lawful to hunt deer with a rifle in the state?_

"Mm."

"Okay," she said. "Let's get that warrant written up."

* * *

 **n: idk if i've ever mentioned this but i was nOT prepared for how Logan ripped my heart out and stomped on it and u bet ur mamas ass i will cry about that film as long as i live and breathe**


	12. i am like decay

Chapter 12: i am like decay, i rot the ground that guides your way

* * *

The first thing she registered was the low, echoing hum in the room. Then it was the pain; a soreness in the bottom of her spine and a dull ache in her head. A pang of hunger drew her attention to her hollow stomach.

Ellie rubbed her eyes with frozen, numb hands. When she opened them, her vision was grey and fuzzy around the edges. From where she laid down, the floor seemed to stretch out into the horizon. What little light remained was dimmed by the snow that covered a broken window high up on one wall.

It had quickly dawned on her that she wasn't waking up in bed. The basement floor was cold and hard against the side of her face. She could tell by the darkness and the chill that the night was fast approaching. A flimsy blue cardigan, definitely not hers, was crumpled under a wheeled metal table a few feet away. Another girl had been here – she shuddered at the thought.

Ellie squinted at the small window. It was cracked open just the slightest bit.

She pushed herself up, blinking through the wave of pain and light-headedness that washed over her, and leaned against the cement wall. As more of her self-awareness kicked in, she brought a hand to one swollen cheekbone and winced at the sensation. Her hand came away with specks of dried blood. A foot away from the corner of the room where she was slumped, a rusty crowbar caught her eye. If it were anything to go by, she guessed she had been knocked out.

It was surreal; she was still here. Still trapped. How long had it been? Her chest tightened and her eyes began to burn. _This can't be real_.

But before her tears had the chance to well up, there was a loud noise from outside, followed by the sound of voices and footsteps.

"There's no way."

"No, they're definitely on to us. We need to get her out of here, and we've got to do it by tomorrow…"

"Don't worry about it, James."

 _Fuck._

Her instincts kicked in. If worse came to worst, she wouldn't go down without a fight. Ellie rushed to nudge the crowbar off to the side, under a low wooden table, cringing at the grating sound of the metal against the concrete floor.

Not a moment too soon.

The door opened, and in he walked, holding a tray of food, and a makeshift gasoline lamp on one hand. She watched blankly as he descended the steps.

"Oh, good," the gravelly voice sent chills down her spine. "You're awake."

Ellie grimaced.

"Awake for long enough, at least. My name's David, in case you don't recall," he chuckled, kneeling in front of her. "Here – you should eat. How are you feeling?"

She pondered on the actuality of her situation; this rotten man could laugh and introduce himself as if in casual conversation. _What the fuck is wrong with this guy?_

She kicked up and knocked the tray out of his hands. There was a clang as everything spilled onto the floor, and her head throbbed painfully at the sound. "I'm not taking anything from you."

"You've been out for quite a while," said David. "Three days, I believe."

Ellie's stomach turned. She had spent _three days_ just slipping in and out of consciousness.

"Now don't get upset. I can take care of you. I've been protecting you, you know."

Her eyebrows knitted in confusion. "From what?"

"The others," he said. "I just need to convince them that you want to stay here with me. What do you say?"

"You're so fucked up," she spat, voice dripping with venom.

He made a noise of derision, like she was being silly. After taking a moment to gaze at her, he spoke. "Please tell me your name."

Ellie stared at him icily.

"Alright, then," he said, dramatically resigned, although he looked menacing in the firelight. She stared, muscles frozen in apprehension, as he took a syringe and a glass vial from his pocket. "I guess that's it for today."

Once again, she kicked at his hands. The lamp tipped over to its side and the vial slipped out of David's hold, breaking into pieces. Ellie stared at the floor as the liquid seeped its way dangerously close to the lamp.

"That's fine," he chuckled, setting the now useless needle on the floor. "It's fine."

Standing up and making his way to the door, he looked over his shoulder and smiled at her. "Stay there, alright?"

"Sure," she smiled back sardonically and muttered, "Like I have anywhere else to go."

"That's right," he hummed in satisfaction before leaving her alone.

As the door closed, Ellie's smile dropped. Her time was ticking. She quickly set the lamp upright and grabbed the crowbar, dragging the wooden table over to the window as quietly as she could. She stepped onto the table then proceeded to push the crowbar through the gap between the frame and the sill, and tried to pry the window open. It didn't budge.

 _It's frozen shut_ , she realized, frustrated. _Come on, think_ …

Ellie grabbed the blue cardigan and tore a strip of fabric from it. She uncapped the jar that served as the makeshift lamp and, holding the flame a good distance away, dipped the strip of cloth into the gasoline before stuffing it into the gap on the window. She put the lid back on the jar and twisted it shut, and then lit the gasoline-soaked cloth in hopes of thawing up the hinges. It made sense. In her head, anyway. Pleased with herself, Ellie decided to give it a few frustrating minutes to work its miracle, before her anxiety began to eat away at her patience.

"Fuck," she swore under her breath. _I don't have time for this!_

Ellie snuffed the flame out and left the lamp jar on the windowsill. She grabbed the crowbar and tried prying the window open once again.

The next thing she knew, the window had widened considerably, but the glass was shattered. It hadn't fallen apart yet, and she didn't hear it, but she knew it was louder than she would've liked. She could already hear footsteps from above.

"Come on, come on, come on!"

Her rabbit heart was pounding in her aching chest. This was make or break. Surely, if she got caught, she would never see the light of day again. She would never see anyone again. Not Joel, not Tess, not Riley. Her throat tightened. The thought made her stomach drop. Despite the weight of her emotions, Ellie soldiered on.

Just as the door burst open, the window finally gave and shards of glass rained down on her. _Yes!_ She almost sobbed in relief. With newfound determination, she reached out the window and braced her hands on the wall to lift herself up.

Ellie's joy was short-lived, however, when a hand closed tightly around her ankle.


End file.
